Fuck You, Klinks
My self-worth can once again be validated by your comments. Proceed.

Ummmm
While shopping at a different grocery store than usual, I noticed the following sign on the freezer case containing popsicles/ice cream treats:
We do not sell individually-wrapped popsicles or ice cream treats. Please do not open the boxes.

I Can't Find My Dictionary
Logical first conclusion: I think someone broke into my apartment and stole it.