a countdown show that helps people
vh1's 100 most wanted bodies offers viewers workout tips in between shots of shirtless men and bikini-clad women. yeah. cause that's why viewers are watching this show. for workout tips.

oh, and don't even get me started on the show's rankings.

sign that i need help
i was watching video clips on 41's website (no...that's not the sign) and thought i recognized a guy in one of the stories. it was a package on wheel of fortune auditions for big 12 week, and the guy in question was wearing a mizzou t-shirt. it made perfect sense. i might know him. i thought...and i thought...and i thought. about an hour later, it hit me. the guy looked like nick from road rules x-treme. i didn't know the guy. he just looked like a guy on a reality show that i watched.

is this the o.c. or saved by the bell?
seriously josh shwartz. locked in the mall overnight? are they trying to get concert tickets, too?

marketing slogan that i wish would catch on
Cracklin' Oat Bran: Soaks Up Milk Like a Maxi Pad

if you still have a soul, i beseech you, stop reading now
i'm thinking of turning schiavo into a verb. eventually, it will mean something to the effect of "put me out of my misery." ex. I'm having a horrible day. Somebody schiavo me! but for now, it means "to string along." ex. another delay? i wish they would stop schiavoing me.