BREAKING NEWS!!!

This is hard-hitting stuff.

Sign It's Time to Quit Working on My Already-Frustrating Homework and Leave the Computer Lab:

The girl sitting next to me who is talking to her boyfriend on her cell phone tells him that her cousins crochet chain mail. There's no making this shit up, folks. Truth is stranger than fiction.

Why Is It Nothing Sounds Good to Eat? OR My Trip to the Grocery Store

It's a bad sign when you run into somebody you know at the grocery store and he looks at your basket full of this week's groceries and remarks, "Snacks, huh?"

Things That Are Disappointing
-The J-School's sorry-ass excuse for a Christmas tree
-The chicken salad sandwich I had for lunch at the Artisan
-My grade on my English paper
-Mizzou's computer labs

Things That Are Good
-Cross-cultural being canceled
-Receiving an e-mail from someone I gave a tour to in June...just so she could let me know she was accepted
-Having 7 items crossed off my to-do list (which is remarkably similar to yesterday's to-do list)

I wasn't getting anything done at home, so I came to the office to try and get some work done before my 4 p.m. meeting. I'm still not getting anything done...but at least I'm not getting anything done someplace other than my apartment.

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Who needs antidepressants when you have a Christmas tree? Every time I look at the darn thing, it makes me smile.

Usually, it's not until well into the second hamburger of my "two cheeseburger no cheese" meal at McDonald's that I feel like spewing. Today, I felt like spewing after bite one. All in an effort to avoid Chipotle because I feel I eat there too much. Thank YOU, Ronald.

A few last thoughts before this blog goes on a Thanksgiving hiatus

Sigh...yes, a return to Raytown and the family's Performa 630CD means a return to a very slow internet connection. Hence, I'll be able to check my e-mail, but blogging will most likely not be happening. Try not to cry too hard, kiddies.

*My little brother and my roommate appear to have bonded. That Rob Coons is quite a charmer.

*Things I will miss over break: living with above charmer, my computer, the Columbia Public Schools Channel, the Artisan

*Things I look forward to over break: free laundry, better cable at my cousin's house (I'm housesitting), mom food, 41 news, dinner w/ Mary Barton (whom if you don't know, you should)

*The incorrectly used "their" from the 11/20 blog posting has been changed to "there." Grammar dorks rejoice.

I'm not a hocker, but this morning, there were no other options...I hate being sick.

A Road Trip Recap...or...Highlights From My Trip to Louisville/Lewisville/Luvull/Looeyville

*Before leaving the Show-Me state, Julie and I stopped for lunch at a Taco Bell in St. Louis. In the corner of the establishment, a couple argued very loudly. I was happy when the man behind us ordered his food for "there" instead of "to go." That way, Julie and I wouldn't be the only ones shot when the domestic disturbance in the corner got out of hand.

*While driving through St. Louis, I finally came up with post-graduation plans. I'm going to create a fake identity and enroll at Harvard University. My new first name will be Barton. (I forget my new last name.) At one point I was going to join a frat and claim my real ID was a fake and buy beer for all my brothers. I think that idea was scrapped, though, in favor of growing my hair out and being an English major rebelling against my father's plans for me to become a lawyer. Julie will be my fake sister, Parker.

*Upon arriving at our hotel, we needed something to eat. Trying to have the complete Kentucky experience, I asked the lady at the front desk where a nearby non-chain restaurant might be. She promptly gave me directions to the Cracker Barrel and Ruby Tuesday.

*We made a lot of wrong turns.

*We "toured" the Louisville Slugger Museum. Here's how our tour went:
Tour Guide: We have bats that we can personalize for you. It doesn't cost much. We can do it in under 45 minutes.
Me: Interesting, but how are the bats made?
Tour Guide: Unintelligible (either because he's Southern or he was drunk) explanation. And we have personalized bats that you can put your photo on.
Me: That's nice.

*We found the cool neighborhood in town and ate there not once, but twice. Plus, we saw a film about an 70-something roller derby demon.

*While eating dinner, we crafted a complex plan involving skipping out on our bill, semi-kidnapping our waiter and moving to Savannah, GA to raise a chicken.

*We learned they call the Kentucky/Indiana area Kentuckiana.

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Right now I should be...

Re-reading a story I have to write a 3-5-page paper about by Friday.


Eh...I was productive yesterday. Isn't that enough for you people?

Making the Grade
A B? Not bad, KSHB. Too bad that news director's gone now.
I hope KCTV's grade will remind the new ND at 41 not to travel too far down Tabloid Terr.

Did any stations in your market make the grade?

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My apologies to the majority of the visitors to this blog, who I am sure could care less about the above posting.

Note to Clare:

Don't do it. You'll never get those precious weeks back.

You want some potato with those semi-solid globs of fat?

I just ate a baked potato from the Potato Ben on campus. Never in my life, have I seen more sour cream and butter in a single serving. It bordered on disgusting (but still resided in tasty-land.) It used to be I told my tours that the Brady Commons food court's slogan was "Anyway you like your heart attack, we'll serve it up fresh for ya." Then, the Taco Bell left. Now, I'm pretty sure I can start using that joke again.

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Sometimes I wish I had better hearing...then, I could eavesdrop on more conversations.

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The following is a list of my classes and the number of times the professor for that class has canceled class this semester. class class (Sorry...I didn't think there were enough "class"es in the last sentence.)

Irish History - 2
English 226 - 2
Computer-Assisted Reporting - 1
Cross-Cultural Journalism - 0

C'mon Cross-Cultural...all the cool classes are canceling. You don't want to be a loser, do you?

In our continuing effort to be the blog you turn to for a topical discussion of television news and journalism ethics...

I wasn't going to post today, but then I saw this.

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Also, I just had a man ask me for money to help him pay for lunch. This man was drinking coffee from Panera. Something tells me that this man could make his money last a little longer if he bought cheaper coffee.

Can expired "butter" kill you?

So, I just ate some butter (actually Blue Bonnet spread...hence the quotes around the abover butter) that was a month past the date on the container. I'm not sure if that's a sell-by date or a use-by date. Either way, I'm pretty sure I shouldn't be enjoying it a month later. However, it was already on my bagels that I'd just paid $1.44 for, and by God, I wasn't going to let that $1.44 go to waist. Plus, cinnamon crunch and cranberry walnut sounded really good. So, after I had spread the spread on my bagels and realized that it was a little outdated, I tried wiping it off with a paper towel. I got most of it. If I die soon (or experience any of the following: explosive diarrhea, intense stomach cramping, projectile vomiting), I apparently did not get enough.

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Cheers to those who have made my clothes smell like smoke two Saturday nights in a row! Let's hear it for bowling and gambling!